New Year's Resolutions

By Mewsette

I don't make New Year's Resolutions myself, because I am already purrfect, thank you.

However, I have a furless human Mom, and it has come to my attention that humans are anything but purrfect. My own is actually quite well trained and very acceptable, as humans go. I've had her for 15 years and I want to keep her. Besides, she loves me and will do absolutely anything for me.

So I decided to be helpful to Mom and make her a nice list of New Year's Resolutions that would be very pleasant and rewarding to me ...er, to her... if she would make. Modesty prevents my saying how wonderful it was of me to do this for her!

Here is my list:

I, Mom, resolve to

-1. Give Mewsette a sardine every day, whether they are good for her or not.

-2. Stop combing Mewsette's fur with all that pulling and mat-breaking, the minute she tells me to.

-3. Forget about giving Mewsette all those icky medicines, because she doesn't like them.

-4. Drop what I'm doing and come immediately whenever Mewsette wants me to follow her into another room, where she found something to complain about.

-5. Drop what I'm doing and come sooner if Mewsette goes under the table to pout, in case her feelings are hurt.

-6. Put Mewsette's warm breeze back where it belongs, at her porch window, instead of that cold rain I negligently allow to be there.

-7. Pull the refrigerator away from the wall more often, so Mewsette can retrieve all her furry mousies that somehow got under there.

-8. Leave Mewsette's basket alone and do not straighten the bedding or remove her lovely fur from it.

-9. Never, never take Mewsette to the v*t again.

There. I thought that was a great list, and quite sensible. Doing all those things would make both of us so happy! Anyway, 9 is as high as I can count. So I showed the list to Mom. Bad move.

Mom gave me that "look" that moms give you after 15 years. In fact, she was about to laugh at me, but she knew what a mistake that would be. I wouldn't have come out from under the table until February.

Well, we compromised. Mom made a resolution to keep on loving me with all her heart and all her strength for all her life. And I made the same one, to keep loving her that way. Oh. And to take my medicine without fussing.

I'm not sure if that came out exactly right. But the subject of New Year's Resolutions is closed.