A Texas Tall Tail

by Lady Blue

They came in the mail. Mom had not ordered them, but there they were. The package said, “SPECIAL SEEDS—DO NOT OPEN UNTIL READY FOR PLANTING.” She put the seed package on the table and opened her other mail. “Bills, bills, bills,” she said as she walked away forgetting about the mysterious seeds. Now one of my brofurs is a very curious cat. He jumped up onto the table and started cautiously touching the small bag. One pat, another pat. Nothing happened. So he took a big swipe and the seed bag dropped to the floor. Jumping down, with his claws spread wide, my brofur tore into that package causing the seeds to fly everywhere. Most of them fell into our water and food dishes, giving off a most unusual and tantalizing odor. By the end of the evening, most of the water, food, and seeds were gone. The next morning, Mom was out in the garden looking at one of her rose bushes that was almost dead. “This has got to come up,” she said. “But how will I do it? The roots are so far down in the ground and so thick, I will never be able to dig it up.” Now what Mom did not know, was that us kitties had started to grow and grow and grow! By the time she got back in the house some of us were over 3 feet high and weighed about a 100 pounds!! “Oh, my!” she said. (Actually she said more than that, but I can’t print it here) She looked at us, astonished, disbelieving! There we all stood, nine enormous felines of the most buxom persuasion. Then she got the most marvelous idea! Running into the garage, she began searching and digging into things. Empty boxes went over her head. Old clothes she saved for the Salvation Army were tossed aside. There, under all of that stuff, was a large coil of rope. She grabbed it and came back into the house. “I don’t know what has happened to you or how long you will remain so, but I am going to need you now.” She began to make a harness of sorts, tying and pulling and placing the harness on us. Six of us boys would do the work while the three girls would be our cheerleaders to encourage us on. Outside we all went. She tied the rope harness on us. Peter was the biggest weighing in at 175 pounds, so he became our lead cat. The end of the rope was tied around the rose bush. “OK, all you fantastic felines, now PULL!” Mom said and gave us a mighty lash with the rope. We leaned into that harness, strained, grunted and groaned. Nothing happened. “PULL! PULL, YOU LAZY CRITTERS!” the girls shouted as they jumped up and down. Their tails lashed out, their paws raised and clinched. We tried again and again and finally we could hear that old rose bush snivel and cower against the rope. Slowly at first, then with a great burst of speed, we got that bush up and out of the ground. The girls came over, hugging and cheering us to victory. Mom covered up the hole and took the rose bush away. “I still can’t believe it,” she sighed. As we all went into the house, Mom stepped on something soft. She bent over and picked it up. In her hand she held the empty seed bag. On the back it said: MUST BE PLANTED IMMEDIATELY! MAGIC LASTS FOR ONLY A DAY. There on the floor was one lonely seed almost hidden under our water bowl.