What A Cat Can Do

by Leo

I know cats can have official jobs, such as a ship's cat or a station cat, jobs which usually entail catching mice. Such a job sounds like fun, as my Devoted Slave read me an article in the Newspaper about a cat which lived at a Railway station in Scotland and held the world record for catching thousands of mice !

I thought that job sounds fun but upon reflection, I'd rather go and catch mice when I feel in the mood. It makes a wonderful hobby but I think having it as a job would take all the pleasure out of it. I'd also be worried that if I didn't catch a certain number of mice a day, I might lose my job or not get my wages ,of a daily tin of best cat food, and as every self respecting cat knows, not every night is good for mousing.

That's why we decided long ago in Egypt to come and live amongst humans, so they would feed us when there weren't many mice around and we also learned to show them the mice we caught, so they'd know how hard we worked. I still do this, though my Devoted Slave doesn't seem to appreciate what I'm doing and always wants to steal it from me! Does she like eating them I wonder ? I've decided that a cat can have a far more important job than one which just involves our natural hunting skills and that is to be a loving companion to Our Devoted Slaves.

Humans are strange creatures where other humans are involved. They say they are lonely, yet they quarrel with their friends, they devise elaborate courtship rituals yet take medicines to stop them having human kittens. We cats are far more straightforward ,we only go courting when we want kittens and if we don't want kittens we avoid the opposite sex .Better still, our humans can take us to have an operation which stops us needing to worry about having kittens at all.

Because of their complicated rituals humans can be wary of showing affection and yet they crave it. They want to be loved and cuddled but are frightened to ask another human if they don't want to take part in a mating ritual. Then they get sad and lonely or even become ill.

We cats can save humans from themselves by being there for them to cuddle as much as they want(or we want them to) and all we want in return is good food, clean water and to share their home .

We learn to sense their moods and come and sit on their laps when they feel sad or lonely, or even cold and we cheer them up and keep them warm. Then when they go to bed, we go with them to watch over them while they sleep and keep them safe. Though we might look to be sound asleep, we always sleep with one eye and one ear open to warn them of danger.

My Devoted Slave has told me stories of cats who have saved their humans lives by warning them when their houses were on fire, or chased off intruders who wanted to hurt them. One clever cat even told it's human that her baby was choking.

A good companion cat with be sure to welcome it's human when they come in and look pleased to see them. They must remember too to allow themselves to be stroked before reminding them that the food dish is empty!

We have lots of other duties too, my personal duties include making sure my human doesn't read anything unsuitable in the Newspaper, so if I see it's about something that might upset her, I sit on it, so she can't read it. My human also tends to spend too long in front of her computer when she should either be getting a meal or going to bed, so I sit in front of the screen , so she can't see what she is doing and has to get up and eat or go to bed.

I also make sure she gets plenty of exercise by hiding when she wants me, so she has to run round the house looking for me and moving the furniture though I've only seen her run really fast if she's seen me heading for her bedroom with my latest freshly caught mouse.

I have to take care of my Devoted Slave's health as I heard her Doctor say that stroking a cat like me could help prevent nasty human diseases like high blood pressure and heart attacks. I've also learned how to cure stomach aches and help my Devoted Slave get better quicker if she catches a virus by seeing she keeps warm.

I've no idea if my Devoted Slave knows how hard I work at my job, or even that I have a" proper" job and am far more than what some people just like to dismiss as a "pet".

I've heard about cats called "Therapy cats" who work in Hospitals and Nursing Homes, but what people don't know is that most of us are Therapy Cats for our individual humans as what better therapy could there be for the stresses of modern life than a loving cat as a companion?

We don't criticise our Devoted Slaves (well we give them a reproachful look sometimes, but only when they deserve it ) we don't argue with them (except for the occasional reproachful mew) and we never say things that hurt them and make them feel unloved or useless. Unlike their human friends we don't want to watch Coronation Street when they want someone to talk to ,nor do we need to go on long business trips and leave them alone.We are always here for them and always loving.

What better job could any cat have than to be a loving Companion to a deserving human ?